16 March, 2010

Emotionally wobbly

I've got some emotional issues running around my head today:

The first is a biggie. Housing. The Lord has abundantly supplied for our year in Australia with this house, but now I find it hard to think about going back to Japan. Terrible that I'd be so tied to material things, but there it is.

We've been offered a house to rent (second photo) that is close to school (one of our criteria) and the price is right. However there are drawbacks. It is not as large as I'd envisaged (you know how bad it is when reality doesn't match our dreams). It only has three smallish bedrooms. No spare room for Lego, visitors or laundry. It is somewhat dark (according to reports). The bathroom is potentially very chilly in winter (it is over the garage).

I'm praying for wisdom...and the ability to let go of my petty material yearnings. As I pray I see more positives about the house. Its layout is better than our previous house. It has two toilets. The kitchen is pretty large (all is relative, you have to understand - moving from my current kitchen which sports something like 3 metres of bench to something where you struggle to find a place to put the toaster takes some adjusting) and the bathroom doesn't look all that bad, even if it is tiled in yellow.

You can see how complicated this is! Add to that the implications of this decision - if we say yes, then we are stuck with the decision for a while. I doubt that we're going to want to move again soon! If we say no, then we're back to the uncertainty of the drawing board - what else will we find, and when? I hate real estate decisions (and I've never faced buying anything).

More emotional issues: I got a weird email from mentally ill friend. Less said the better. But things like that make me feel more emotionally wobbly than usual.

Today I also have a sick child forcing me to be him-centered, instead of me-centred and doing the things I'd planned to do. Terrible, isn't it, how self-centred we are!

And of course my husband is away in the midst of all this. He's my sounding board, generally, and helps me sort out these emotions, just by listening. Amazing man! I don't like this association of vomiting children and his absences, though. Thankfully there aren't any more of his planned absences on the calendar.


Catherine said...

Oh Wendy! Those decisions are so hard - he times when you wish for lightning bolts from heaven and explicit guidance. And sick kids too! Is this again? I seem to remember reading that David was away and your kids were vomiting.

Praying for you.

Wendy said...

Yes, David being away and vomiting kid is *again*. It happened in November too!

I'm praying for lightening bolts too. It is not a decision I want to regret for the next ?4 years.

Tim and Susan said...

Sick kids are no fun. Tim is away this week too and it's hard to make decisions that he does better with.

Have you seen inside pictures to help you decide on the house? Praying for wisdom and dicernment on that, and peace from God about where to rent.