We ate the bitter melon (goya)

So I did it. I cooked up the vegetable that our neighbour gave me last week and I have photos to prove it.

On the left: is Teriyaki Pork Stir Fry (this recipe, though with different vegetables and I also added tofu) the one on the right (and also below) is Cantonese Bitter Melon Omelette.

The stir fry was too salty for our tastes (I never add salt to recipes). The recipe was otherwise very nice, I'm just not sure what to do about the salt, which all came from the soy sauce. Can you buy low-salt soy sauce in Japan?

The omelette I liked, though others didn't necessarily. My husband said that if you had a mixed mouthful of egg and vegetable it was fine, though one of our boys couldn't finish it.

All in all, I'm really pleased. I am not usually any good at stir-fries but this one worked well (aside from the saltiness). Everyone got fed and we received few complaints. I cooked two new recipes and used a new, local vegetable that grew over the road from us.

The goya or bitter melon has an amazing shape and made for photogenic cooking, though I didn't get the focus right on this photo (this was before adding the eggs).

Saturday's Finals

Time is racing fast these days and I've just realised that I haven't written about the Track and Field finals on Saturday. 

Final straight of the 400m for our middle son.

Discus is hard to photograph without a telescopic lens. We were behind
two fences.

It was a gorgeous day, sunny and very warm (upper 20Cs) at least for these Tokyoites who've been freezing for what seems like ever-so-long. So warm we had to be careful not to get sunburnt and many were retreating to the trees scattered around the track. We sat under umbrellas a lot of the day as there was no roof on the stands. 

It was a 12-hour day for me, a bit longer for the team who left earlier than I did. I left, with a car-full of people at 7.30am and got home at 7.30pm. Of course we stopped for dinner on-base at the American fast food court. I enjoyed Subway (the chain is in Japan, but none close to our house).

I get really nervous about wrestling, but generally haven't with track and field. Maybe because my boys haven't had super lofty goals. However this time one of them did. 

Before the 400m and 100m of our middle son, I was just as nervous as I am at wrestling. But he did really well. He ran or threw personal best scores for all his events, even the relay team he was in ran a team-best. And he got three top-eight finishes too, which meant ribbon awards at the end of the day in 400m (5th), 4x400m (3rd), and discus (4th). He wasn't completely happy, his goals were higher than that, especially for the 100m (in which he came 10th out of about 100 runners from eight schools). But I was happy.

Finishing the 1,600m in first place surprised us all.

Our youngest son's overall placings weren't spectacular, which we expected, because he's competing against boys up to about 16 years of age—if they're in middle school, grades 6 to 8, they can compete. This seems grossly unfair from the perspective of an Aussie where athletics is conducted in one-year age groups. However he did produce an exciting finish in his 1,600m heat. He's pretty new at this event and didn't pace himself quite right, however he pulled out an amazing finish in which he closed a gap of about 60m in the last lap to win the race by about three metres. That went some way toward making up for the disappointment in not getting PRs or great placings.

Not too many years ago I was a "never wear pink"
gal. I'm reformed!

I'm really happy that our middle son placed in his events. This is something his brother hasn't managed to do in track and field, so this is "his" thing. I want each of my boys to find what they're passionate about. Seeing them achieve in those areas is very satisfying.

So now we have about four months of no sport on Saturday. I'm looking forward to some nice sleep-ins. But not looking forward to having to motivate my sporty boys to get out and get some exercise of their own volition. Strangely, they usually don't naturally take the initiate yet in that area. But if they don't, they get unhappy and restless. Hopefully they'll start to recognise that about themselves and take initiative more often these summer holidays.

I loved seeing these two younger siblings in the wider CAJ family
 have a wonderful time playing under the trees behind the stands.
You can't see it clearly, but there are soft "friends" placed in the tree.

A dangerous question

We caught a glimpse of this beautiful sunset on our way home. This is the
playground and oval of the school. ("Oval" is Aussie for playing field).

I'm at the point of feeling like I overwhelm everyone around me if I actually try to answer the ubiquitous question: "How are you?" I open my mouth longer than five seconds and wrestling tumbles out (and it's not the first time, this has happened every year for four of the last five years, see here). If I manage to dodge that or get past it I'm stuck on the challenges of my son's and parenting then. Argghhh.


So sorry to anyone who's been bombarded by my current limited conversation. And for those who haven't, beware of asking me how I am because I struggle to just answer "Fine".

So, seeing as I'm not in a conversation and you can click away from this at any time, I'm feeling free to say here how I am.

I'm obviously caught up in wrestling. It consumes our family conversation and thoughts.

A sample of the many texts that went back and forth on Saturday.

Saturday was another big day. David with our two older boys left at 5.30am for the high school meet south of Yokohama, along with two other wrestlers who slept at our house. I took our youngest son on the train to support the middle school team (he sustained a hand injury last Saturday so couldn't wrestle) at a Catholic boy's school about an hour from here. 9am-3pm was spent in a loud, echoing gym. I cheered, videoed, directed (you were called up weren't you? Go and support your team mate...), and chatted.

Interspersed in all that was multiple texts. Our middle son was the only CAJ supporter at the high school meet. He kept me up-to-date on results, one bout at a time. And I passed the information on to those parents I have connection with. Which equalled lots of texting.

We got home from the middle school meet at 5pm, close to when our eldest son was wrestling in the final. I knew it would be a tough battle because he was up against someone from the host school. It's the same guy he's wrestled many times in the last two seasons, and they almost always are tough bouts. But I knew this guy would really want to win in front of his home crowd. Instead of being able to watch it I had to sit at my dining room table and wait for a text. It was hard, but once I found out that the final score was 14-10 to our son, I was almost glad I knew the result before watching the match. I may have needed oxygen afterwards if I'd actually been there!

However our son remains undefeated this season after 21 bouts and I feel like we're living a dream. But at the same time I feel a twinge of embarrassment. Success like this for my boys is something I've dreamed about and hoped for but not really expected will happen. So how do I deal with it actually happening? I'm absurdly proud of what he's achieved, but at the same time aware that many others who long for this don't get it. What do I do with all that? How do I cope with the pride welling up in me without bursting or overwhelming others with it? How do I keep a perspective that includes those who aren't experiencing this success?


There is now only one more meet on Japanese soil (this Saturday). Then next Wednesday the team (including David, as assistant coach) leaves for their three-day meet in Korea. I also leave to travel to the meet with three other parents, but we travel separately to the team.

Our younger two sons will stay with another CAJ staff family. That is a considerable disruption in the nice routines of life, which one of them, particularly, is struggling with.

So you can imagine how it is hard to focus on anything else. Of course, in the middle of this we have got work to do, and especially our year twelve student has tonnes of homework. But it's hard to concentrate...and to have conversations not related to what currently consumes my family.

But I must struggle on with a semblance of normal life.

I've got a magazine in the depths of editing, which means keeping tabs on a bunch of things and people. Lots of spinning plates in the air. Tomorrow I've also scheduled a coffee time with a new colleague. Hopefully I'll be able to exercise self control and talk about other things. Probably asking lots of questions will be a good strategy!

Inspiring sporting stories

Our middle son winning a race earlier in the year.

One of the blogs I read is by Rachel, a cross-cultural worker in Djibouti. She's just had an article published in Runner's World about a woman who is a former Olympic runner who trains girls in her country to run. It's an inspiring story. These women are going up against so many obstacles in their country: cultural norms, poverty, danger, weather, etc.

"We train girls to run, and use club membership as motivation for them to stay in school. We focus on developing strong character and good health and hygiene."

It's well worth a read. 

Another cross-cultural worker has written at velvetashes.com about what we can learn from sports movies (or backstories from the Olympics). I'm a sucker for a good sports movie, or any kind of movie or story where a lot of work goes into developing a skill and there is victory in the end. A story like this is most likely to get me teary, far more than a romance (you can see me like this at sporting events where my boys are competing and succeeding). The article lays out several areas we can learn from these stories:

• teamwork is essential
• victory is not a given
• long term perspective is encouraged
• redemption (significant change occures)

These are things we can learn from as we live the missionary life.

The only thing that puzzles me is the title of the article: "Potato Chips as a Healthy Meal." If anyone can explain that to me...

Dental success

Today I not only went to the dentist, I made appointments for three more family members all by myself. I feel accomplished!

Medical and dental are two areas where it's easy to feel very shaky when you're overseas. This week we've been hearing of the medical dramas of friends/colleagues who've just arrived in Taiwan with their toddler and baby for the first time, so don't have much language yet. I feel for them! Thankfully they have had good help from English-speakers.

So we got good dental care in Australia and were told to get checkups six months after we got back to Japan in July last year. Well soon after we arrived in Japan we discovered that the kind dentist I mentioned here had retired. So I was without a dentist. I'd like to write "the hunt began" but it didn't really. It wasn't until April that I finally got around to finding a dentist that would be able to cope with my limited dental Japanese. 

Got to love their English, though. The conclusion on my teeth when I finally got an appointment was "we can't see any cavities or gum disease, so your brushing mustn't be too bad"!

Then they explained that they couldn't clean all my teeth that day. What? They explained that Japanese medical insurance doesn't cover it. So you have to have your teeth cleaned over two separate appointments. I don't know what our previous dentists did (maybe they fiddled the books?) but we've never had to have two appointments just for teeth cleaning before.

Nevertheless, I got the rest of my teeth attended to today, all by myself. And I've arranged for the rest of the family as well! The third boy sees a dentist/orthodontist regularly. They clean all his teeth every time (he's never had such clean teeth). But probably insurance isn't covering that!

Sometimes small things are so satisfying.

I had meant to try to squeeze a ride to the park today, but discovering this morning that I had a mid-morning dental appointment put a stop to that thought. I did ride, though, to the dentist, post office, and two grocery stores. None of them very far away, but it was a short ride and I kept my eyes open for beautiful flowers. There are so many at this time of year! I stopped to take a photo of these beauties gracing an otherwise dull concrete retaining wall next to our river.

More wrestling excitement and success

Today's excitement is by remote. My younger two boys and I were at our home church this morning, but half our hearts were in Canberra with David and our eldest son as he wrestled at the National Wrestling Titles. I wanted to be there, but the travel was too expensive to justify us both going again.

So all I know is from texts and one phone conversation, we've not see any photos or videos yet. They come home this evening, and you can bet no one's going to bed before we've seen the videos.

This is an old photo of us supporting mat-side. It's what
I wanted to be doing this time too. 

The competition is a little sparse in Australia. His teammate entered the 54 kg class and had no competition, so got a gold without a match. Our son, however, had two others to compete against, and he pinned them both! That makes him the current holder of the Australian 69 kg Cadet title (16 - 17 year olds).

As you can imagine there's been plenty of excitement here. This is the first time in about three years that I haven't been mat-side to cheer him on, so I'm a little sad. However I do still have an intact voice! But he'll get a cheer when we pick them up from the train station this evening.

I announced it on Facebook and there's been lots of congratulations. A couple of people asked about international competition. From the looks of the calendar, there is no international "cadet" competition this year, but only juniors (18-20 year olds). But even if he were able to go to something he'd probably need a sponsor or a part-time job. We're talking about places like France. Time enough for that later, if he's good enough. Once you get outside of Australia the competition is very tough. Wrestlers peak in their mid to late 20s, so a teenager still has a way to go.

His involvement in wrestling continues to produce interesting responses from Australian. From bewilderment to curiosity as well as indifference. It really is a fairly foreign sport for the majority of Aussies.

I'm just glad that we've been able to help him continue his involvement in the sport, though we've been away from his school's team in Japan. It most certainly has helped him cope with this year away from Japan. Having success here is just the icing on the cake.



For anyone who's interested in what this type of wrestling looks like, I've posted a video of a 2013 World Junior Championships final below (55kg). There are places in this video that I laughed out loud, especially at the antics of the winner (and the ref) at the end.

Today's successes

I'm feeling accomplished and thankful.

Transport without a car
The problem with being reliant on bikes to get places, is that weather can intervene, as can other problems like mechanical failure. Today I woke to teeming rain. That meant alternatives needed to be found to get the boys to school because David leaves too early to take them three days a week. Thankfully a retired couple from our church who live close by were able to help out.

Life in Australia revolves around the use of cars. This
was my first car and made getting around to things
off-campus much easier. I gave many people lifts in
this oldie (older than me), she was such a blessing.

It also meant that Plan A: to ride to the bus to get to my physio appointment this morning, was in jeopardy. Plan B also failed: change appointment to later.

So I went to Plan C, which was to walk through the rain with a large umbrella, except that when I got out the door I realised that the rain had all but stopped. So, in the end I got back to Plan A and rode. I didn't even have to go with the second half of Plan C, which was to wait for David to pick me up on his way home from lecturing. Yay. 

That is a mental weight lifted off me. I know I can get to the two nearest train stations and three nearby shopping centres (within 10km) independent of a car now. Yes, I know, we've only got three months left here...but still I feel less shut-in.

Progress at the physio
I've been seeing a physio for a niggly knee issue and frequent headaches. This is something I've put off for a long time because it costs money and time. In fact I didn't even think of seeing a physio about my headaches until I filled out the New Patient form while waiting to see her for the first time. I've struggled with headaches for many years, but it seems like we're making progress on that. I'm trying to look after myself, and maybe it's going to pay off!

Medical expenses claimed
I also accomplished something this morning that frustrated me all yesterday morning. I managed to claim some medical expenses on-line with Medicare. This is a re-entry shock kind of problem. I guess all Australians have had to deal with this change, but we encounter four years' worth of changes all at once. I guess I've just missed out on this one until now because most places we've been this time at home have done the claiming as you pay them. 

Last time we were in Australia you had to go to a Medicare office to get it done, or post a claim form. Now it is done on a smart device: phone or tablet, using a website that I am thankful I discovered and registered with before coming back to Australia. However yesterday I had numerous problems that blocked me, especially my inability to get the password right and a phone that has too little space on it. I ended up getting myself blocked for 12 hours. But this morning managed to accomplish it (at least I haven't heard that it was unsuccessful yet).

Storage for our return
The fourth thing that I'm excited about it that we're also making progress in finding a place to store our household goods for the coming three years. Can't say much more than that, but it looks like God's provided a way over a big hurdle.

Bad days, good days.

There are days in a foreign land where you just have a bad day. You can't find the right words, you run into people who can't or won't help you, and you start to feel defeated, even home sick.

Then there are days when things seem to go right. The words snap into place, people understand what you're saying, and you just get things right (or right enough). Both of these kinds-of days happen when you're in your home country too, but somehow they seem more pronounced when you're out of your most comfortable zone.

Well, I had the second kind of day today. I thought you'd like to know about successful days, not just the baddies, so here goes.

This morning I started off with the usual—getting kids to school. We didn't have any significant fights, that's a good start.

Just before I farewelled my last son out the door, I remembered something about him having an on-computer spelling game to complete before the end of the week. He didn't have it written down, so had forgotten. Not surprising after a particularly hectic afternoon-morning of homework in which he tried to catch-up on other homework not completed earlier in the fortnight. Anyway, I, by some miracle, caught it and he had time to correct the problem. Plus, he did it cheerfully. Not always a trait associated with our middle son, but it was pleasant to enjoy its balm.

After that, an hour long meeting with my Executive Editor on Skype. This usually happens on Wednesday but we had to reschedule this week. An uneventful meeting, but with an underlaying feeling as though we're continuing to make progress on improving the magazine.

I squeezed in a little bit of email and computer work before I headed off to the hospital again for the final (women's business) tests required by our medical advisor. A bit painful, but done without too much difficulty and without much English. And I managed it all on my own. That is one of the best feelings in a foreign land.

It was a bit dicey at the end when the doctor told me that because they'd found no problems (yay!), the tests weren't covered by health insurance (boo!). I searched my person while waiting for the bill, but found less than 10,000 yen, which shouldn't have been enough and I wondered how I was going to manage this. Then the bill was rung up as 2,900 yen. Yay! No idea what happened, but I'm not unhappy.

So I rode down the road to Starbucks and had a rare coffee-shop coffee with a sandwich to celebrate my successes of the morning (not the least, getting the tests done). The Gingerbread Latte wasn't quite to my liking. I'm not sure what spice they used, but it sure didn't taste like ginger! Nonetheless, a rare trip to a coffee shop on my own was delicious.

Then I headed home on my bike, feeling all light headed with success. Dropped into the shop we buy milk at and while I was there hurdled another barrier that I hadn't tried before. I "used" the points that we'd been accumulating on our ?loyalty card. That took 400 yen off the bill. I felt successful again!

Then I headed home to pick up all the parcels that we'd packaged up the night before for our families in Australia. Loaded all of them on my bike. They piled up nicely, one may have mistaken me for Mrs Claus. And rode off to the Post Office. Once there I negotiated the "which type of mail do you want to send them by" trial. There seems to be so many ways to send a parcel from Japan! Strangely enough, the fastest way, was almost the cheapest.

My loaded bike.

The Post Office is a place that used to be almost as scary as a hospital to me, but not today. Anyway, then I spent about 15 or so minutes filling in forms about the exact contents of the box, including their cost. Even though my husband wrote a list out, I was still guessing a bit, but no one seemed to mind. I just hope no customs officer opens them in Australia and gets upset because I didn't count correctly.

Got that lot dealt with, and paid for. And then, another great triumph of the day: I remembered that we wanted to stop the mail from arriving for the week that we'll be away before Christmas, just in case someone sends us a present that arrives that week. So, I filled out another form, this one was an easy one. And Japan Post really has it over Australia Post on this front. It is a free service, with a smile!

Then I headed over to CAJ with a library book to return, and a book to donate to the library. I spent a while finding books to read over the holidays for me, and our younger two boys. I don't remember my mum needing to do this for me, but it seems that my boys struggle to find their own books to read. They need a bit of a helping hand. It is only recently that I abdicated that responsibility for our 13 y.o. and handed it over to him. He still needs some reminders, but he is starting to do it for himself.

And now I'm home, relaxing after a busy, but satisfying day. In the midst of it all I got some nice exercise too. The ride to the hospital includes a nice hill and took me about 15-20 minutes to complete each way. Plus riding around like Mrs Claus, well, that wasn't so bad, but I really do like getting out on my bike, especially on a beautiful autumn-like day like today.

Hmmm, but I do have a bit of email work to get to following up on my meeting this morning. How much do you think I can squeeze in before the boys tumble in the door? Once they're here I won't be able to do much at all, because they'll be excited: we're going to the Middle School Christmas concert this evening, with the all-important traditional hot chocolate afterwards.