The God who goes before you

Today I'm remembering a beautiful story that unfolded between three friends around an impulsive gift of earrings two years ago. It's worth reading again: https://mmuser.blogspot.com/2020/03/surprise-in-mail-at-just-right-time.html My friend in Australia is wearing those earrings again today as she remembers her 13 y.o. son, who died two years ago today. I'm also wearing a pair of "Nozomi" earrings as I share her grief. Nozomi's tagline is "beauty in brokenness." I love the symbolism here and that we can be close through these earrings, despite the distance.

Yesterday, in a completely different set of emotional events, I was reminded that God is the God who goes before us. So far this year I've needed to be reminded of this verse from Deuteronomy 31 repeatedly:

It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed (v 8).

God is indeed one who goes before us, who prepares the way. I often pray this verse as my husband and I start our days:

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do (Eph. 2:10 NIV).

Reflecting on that theme in scripture just now...God went before the Israelites in the desert with a pillar of cloud and fire for forty years, and then, as they prepared to cross the Jordan River to occupy the land God had promised them, he reassured them he was preparing a new land for them.

What a great thought to keep a hold of in the midst of doing daily life: God prepares the way for us. He's not an absent spectator. Later, in the New Testament, we're told that Jesus is going ahead of us into heaven to prepare a place for us there too. Also a great truth to regularly remember, especially as we face unknown and uncertain future events  As we work towards spending several weeks in other people’s homes and out of our usual routines mid-year, this will be an important truth for the Marshalls to remember.

 

Adjusting to more spacious schedule

Strangely, I'm still trying to adjust to no longer being in a period with no margin. The first two months of this year were really a bit too much on top of a lengthy period over the last couple of years where I've felt powerless in certain areas of my life and unable to make plans. I am gradually recovering, but emotionally dealing with the changes that have come in the last few weeks is harder than I expected.

At work I've been coming to grips with needing to do some things that aren't exciting or urgent (for example, updating the magazine's style guide!), but are important. That requires a little less adrenaline and a bit more grit. But I am celebrating with my team as we put finished another magazine (print) issue this afternoon. I look forward to seeing the Spring issue in print in a couple of weeks.

This week, with a bit more of a spacious work schedule and the knowledge that our trip to Australia in June is coming up quickly, I've once again become the family-communication point-person for international transition (or at least parts of it).

Good news is that we've got our organisation's approval to come to Australia, and for me to work from there for a while after David and our youngest son come back in early August to start school. Yes, we did need their permission because we don't want to get in trouble with anyone for a "misuse of charitable funds"! 

I'll stay longer in Australia with our middle son to do some reconnaissance for his future. He's still deciding about what his next steps are, and I hope that an un-hurried period in Australia as a young adult will help him consider what he might like to do next. Last time he was there he was 16, and in a period of high anxiety and stress at school, so it's really hard for him to imagine what life in an English speaking country might be like as an independent adult. 

Oh, and we want to spend time with our 22 y.o. son, who we won't have seen for three years! I imagine those first hugs will be a bit emotional. A lot has happened in three years.

But we'll still only be there for three months, so a bit of pre-planning is required. I've been looking at leads on accommodation and cars, corresponding with service providers, and various OMF people. If you know of a car we could use, or a place with three bedrooms that we could stay in that's not too far from the Indooroopilly area in Brisbane, please let us know.

And just to be clear, we're not doing any home assignment time this year—so we won't be speaking at churches or making a concerted effort to catch up with many people. That will have to wait until after June 2023.

We are enjoying a break from the cold Tokyo winter weather. These last several days have seen temperatures in the high teens and low to mid 20s (Celsius). After three months of temperatures in single digits or slightly above, it's a welcome break. Tomorrow is supposed to be back down to 11, Saturday 18, Sunday and Monday 13/14, and next Tuesday 8! But that's spring here for you.

Last week, to celebrate the change of seasons, I bought a 100 yen flowering plant and finally got to do some repotting this afternoon after lunch (in line with the "more spacious work schedule"). Hopefully it will do well and cheer our spirits as we move up and down the stairs. I also replaced the hanging plant that looked like a sopping-wet rag and was clearly on its way out. In the midst of that, found a couple of maidenhair fern offspring that had taken root alongside another plant, so I gave them their own tiny pots. We'll see how this little bit of "sprucing up" of my window garden will go now that the temperatures are rising.

My new plant: Sweet Alyssum. First time I've
tried this one, my app says it's perfect for 
gardeners with brown thumbs, which sounds 
great to me.

My baby maidenhair fern.

We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on God

This has been an odd week in our house. My husband spent all week at two school camps, one after the other. Our youngest son was at the first camp and he got back on Wednesday. So for 2 ½ days it was just me and our middle son here at home. Distinctly weird.

Life goes on, however. I’m thankful for a quiet week at work, so I was able to take a non-desk day on Wednesday. I did household jobs and also rode to the “big park” for a picnic. And today have enjoyed time over coffee with a friend and also being able to attend a school prayer meeting that I have only managed to attend one other time in 2022.

During the week I also had time to spend talking to a couple of other friends on audio/video calls. So refreshing. God’s reminding me of those special people in my life who care very deeply. One of my friends I haven’t been able to talk to or have much interaction at all with since I last saw her in Australia in 2018. It’s a precious friend with whom you can pick up again after gaps like that.

Plum blossoms are out everywhere. While not
as common or popular as cherry blossoms,
 they are still gorgeous. Certainly there
 was a buzz in the park as people gathered
to admire them.

Something that’s giving me hope is that it seems like we’re starting to make greater progress in finding a way forward from the difficult situation we’ve been in over the last couple of years. It’s hard to describe this clearly here, in this public space, where I don't feel free to share all the details. I will say, though, that there’s been a lot of emotional ups and downs (more downs than ups) and at times the future’s looked bleak, as you may have picked up from various blog posts I’ve written. A dear friend I shared the details with didn’t mince her words when she described our situation as “walking through crap”. 

But in the last week tiny cracks of light have appeared: a couple of friends/colleagues who have volunteered to find out information for us as we prepare for the future, enquiries have gone out to different places that might net some practical help, and the knowledge that we’ll have (hopefully) feet on the ground in Australia in just over three months time. And someone who’s given us a generous donation that will help cover some of the extra expenses coming up.

I was reminded last week at the retreat, of this verse from 2 Chronicles 20 part of a prayer by King Jehoshaphat: “We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you” (second half of verse 12 NIV). I included it in my very first blog post this year; it’s a good one to remember! Indeed we’re waiting with bated breath to see what God will do. Of course there’s no guarantee of a good result (from our limited human perspective), but we know that God is infinitely reliable, even if we don’t understand what he does, or like the timeline that he’s working by.

Also, something even more tangible to contribute to the hopeful feelings—we've booked two different campsites for the last week of March. Plan A and Plan B. We were feeling a bit nervous after so many plans fell through on our last opportunity to go camping in autumn last year, so two options are available and we'll cancel one as needed.

I’m grateful for lots to be thankful for this week, and more to look forward to also. What are you thankful for this week?

Spiritual emergency kit

The forest outside the chapel where we met to
contemplate these three questions. We could 
only see glimpses through the narrow
windows of the auditorium. It was nice to
nip out and snap a photo.

A wall of faith

This was the topic at the women's retreat I went on late last week. The theme was based on the idea that you identify (and memorise) Scriptures and other “bricks” like songs, quotes, etc. that will help you weather difficult times. Especially times when you don’t have access to a Bible or phone. For example in the middle of the night when your thoughts are swirling around getting snagged on negatives and dragging you down into anxiety and stress. Or when you’re sitting with your loved one waiting for an ambulance to arrive. Or stuck in traffic and late for an appointment and feeling anxious.

Our speaker split these into three easy-to-remember categories, the foundation being—who is God? Followed by—who am I? And then—why am I here?

These are really fundamental questions. We were encouraged to find our own “bricks” in these categories at the retreat, bricks that have particular significance to us. But that was too much for me to contemplate while I was at the retreat. My desire was to soak in being present with these precious women. That turned out to be about all I could cope with. Now there is time to reflect on the messages and come up with some of my own verses. There are so many! Here are some I might add to my spiritual emergency kit:

Who is God?

He can do all things, no plan of his is thwarted. Job 42:2

He is our refuge and strength, an every-present help in trouble. Psalm 46:1

He is a shepherd who tenderly takes care of his flock (us). Isaiah 40:11

He is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. Isaiah 40:28

He is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer. Psalm 18:2

My provider. Matthew 7:11–33

“When you don't understand, when you don't see his plan, when you can’t trace his hand, trust his heart” From a song "Trust his heart" by Babbie Mason

He goes before me: “The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” Deuteronomy 31:8

Who am I?

Created and called by God, not a mistake. Ps 139                                    

Precious. 1 Peter 2:4

Loved. Jeremiah 31:3

Alien and a stranger on earth 1 Peter 2:11 but now a member of God’s household Ephesians 2:19

Why am I here?

I’m here to do his will, even if that means sitting still. “Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him.” Psalm 37:7 

To declare the praises of God. 1 Peter 2:9

To glorify God by serving with the strength he provides. 1 Peter 4:11

Because God wants me here. Ps 139:16

To do good works that God has prepared beforehand. Ephesians 2:10

Competent because God makes me that way. 2 Cor. 3:5

I'm not good at memorising, but already can see how helpful this might be. A couple of times since Friday I've been stuck in that spot halfway between sleep and wakefulness, and thinking through those of these that I could remember has been helpful and has calmed my heart, even if I can't remember all the verses, I can remember the key point. And now I've written them down, I can review them when I need to!

How about you? Do you have answers to these questions that help you when times are tough?