Encouragement

Here's a couple of written exchanges about my blog that I've received recently:

Encouragement
Recently a teenager, who is the child of missionaries in Japan, sent me an email that completely made my day:

Random flower photo that I took this time last year.
I put it here because it's always nice to have a
flower to look at.

I meant to tell you . . . [when I saw you last] that I followed your blog but kept forgetting to, I'm sorry!

I wanted to say that I love your blog because I get a peek inside of a different missionary family's life, which I don't often get to.

I also love that your blog gives me reminders about God's word, and what he is going to do in my life.

In a blog post the other day, I read your poem "Dates" and I loved it! I like writing poetry and fiction. Your poem gave me an insight into what being an adult is like, and I enjoyed that.

Thank you for your wonderful blog. I'll be looking forward to the next update!

It's easy to be worn down by the routines and challenges of daily life (and writing and editing), so I love it when I get such encouragements. Having it written down makes it even more special, because it's easy to keep and treasure later (and easier to share with you too).

About why I blog

I recently had a colleague who discovered this blog and he asked me about the main purpose (he was thinking that the main reason a missionary might use a blog would be to update our supporters). 

This was my reply:

My initial purpose was to write about the “ordinary” life of a missionary, helping to readers (presuming them to be people who haven’t lived the missionary lifestyle) to see what our lives are like. As I’ve realised that a lot of missionaries also read it, it’s expanded a bit to be a place that also reaches out to other missionaries, hopefully in an encouraging, honest way, by telling about my journey.

It isn’t for supporters specifically, or for staying in touch with friends or anyone in particular, though some do read if for that reason. It is not something where I ask people to pray for us either.

He also wrote: "I only have the newsletter... Sometimes I wondered if I should make a Facebook group for me Facebook friends who are interested in what we are doing... But the more "mediums" one uses... - the more has to 'feed' them... "

My reply:

Yes, the more mediums you use the more work you create for yourself! I write because I’m a writer. Often writing on my blog is quite therapeutic for me, not a burden as it would be for many. It has helped me hone my writing and editing skills as to fit writing this blog into my life I often have to process and write very quickly.

The struggle for identity

I've written before about how I struggle on how to introduce myself. Or, how do I fill out the form, say, at the doctor/physio: "Occupation?"

Usually at churches we're introduced as "The Marshalls from Japan" or "The Marshalls who serve in Japan".

When I went to the writer's conference in November, I ended up with the name tag on the right, primarily because I couldn't decide which place to write for "where are you from".

I say, when I need to, "I'm living in Ipswich/Brisbane but usually live in Japan."

There is an element of identity in this. Without context, it is hard to have much beyond a cashier-type conversation with people. It can get complicated fast if I refuse to tell people a bit more of the story. I'm a simple person: straight truth is the easiest manner of conversation. And if that means I admit that I've lived a weird life, well so be it.

The matter of identity is more complex for our kids. I can get away with saying, "I was born in Toowoomba and went to uni in Brisbane." It's only after that that things get more complicated.

My kids, however, have been labelled most of their lives with "missionary kids (or MKs)" or "from Japan". They feel strongly Australian, but when in Australia know for sure that they aren't the same as other Australian kids.

In Japan we're also labelled. No matter how long we stay there, our appearance states out front that we're not insiders. We don't belong. That's a factor of the Japanese culture, where belonging is strongly tied to "sameness" and genetics. We're not genetically Japanese, so we'll never be truly Japanese (even if we become citizens).

The labels help with communication, but sometimes they hinder. With labels comes stereotypes. 

Our labels produce questions like these in Australia:

"Oh, you like sushi?"

 "You're fluent in Japanese?"

"You must like living there!"

Or, in Japan:

"Ah, beer drinking Aussie who carries a large knife!" (Just kidding, no one has ever said that to me.)

"Why aren't you tanned, don't all Aussies swim and get brown?" (Truly, I've had this from Japanese people.)

"Of course you're a Christian, you come from Australia where everyone is Christians."

People, even Christians, often feel uncomfortable at the label "missionary", which is why I often avoid using it first up. Just the other day I wrote "editor" on the form at the physio. I later told her I was a missionary, but it wasn't at the start of our conversation. 

So I can totally understand this young man's reluctance to be introduced as "an MK from Japan." By all means find that out, but start with finding out about me, not my label.

Many people have this struggle, people with disabilities, for example, or even people who are extraordinarily beautiful, talented, or famous. There is a barrier to getting to know the real person and most people don't get past the barrier.

If you go to the link above (this young man), you'll find some great suggestions for non-MKs, including this:

On Behalf of all MKs everywhere, please, treat us like normal people. True, we may be strange, socially-awkward, and not have the best fashion sense but all we want is to have a fair chance to be your friend. The reason we are weird is because our life is weird.