Unexpected hospitality opportunity

Yesterday I did something a bit unusual. 

I'm gradually realising that having extra free time gives me the opportunity to say yes to unexpected opportunities to serve and to connect with people. This month I've had coffee on two occasions with two different friends who happened to be in my neck of the woods and had time to spare. Both of them prefaced their invitation with "I've got this crazy idea"...and I was able to say yes both times and have precious time with them.

Then last Wednesday I got a message from a colleague about the five-day workshop she was organising at our OMF Japan headquarters this week. She was urgently trying to make sure the 23 people attending had lunch each day and they'd suddenly found themselves without someone to make lunch one of the days. As it turns out my work this week is pretty slow, so I had the time to go and do this. 

It was a big task, though, because it takes nearly two hours to get to the OMF headquarters on the other side of Tokyo by train (there's currently no car parking onsite due to renovations). So the decisions I had to make as I executed this plan were:

• selecting a meal that I could quickly make with easily accessible ingredients in the kitchen (two microwave-sized ovens, a two-burner stove, but lots of bench/counter space)
• budgeting—using two cheaper stores that I have close to me that I know they also have near JHQ
• figuring out quantities for this number of people
• figuring out timing, which included me buying the ingredients after I got there on the day, using a borrowed bike, and then doing the cooking

And then executing the plan. I couldn't do much prep at home or take much with me because of the train travel (and most of them quite crowded).

I did well on the first two of the above, not so well as the second two:

1. I bought too many ingredients. One of my biggest fears as a mum of teenage boys was not having enough food, so I've learned to cook too much! But because this was just day three of a five-day live-in workshop, there was plenty of scope for using the leftover salad and other things later in the week.

2. I didn't have enough time to do all that I'd planned on my own, but I easily found two wonderful helpers.

Sadly, the only photo I took of the whole event
was of the leftover ingredients at the end!

What did I make? Loaded potatoes: baked/jacket potatoes that you "load up" with various fillings. It was buffet style and I provided bacon, grated cheese, chickpeas, boiled egg, and yoghurt (cheaper substitute to sour cream). I also had a bunch of raw salad options that people could choose from to add to their plate as well as salad dressing, and a platter with the fruit that cheapest right now (apples, bananas and pineapple). It was a healthy, tasty, and economical meal that didn't require too much cooking and could easily be sourced locally.

It was a joy to use my ability to cook (again) to serve others outside of our household. I've been sharing baked goodies at church and mission events, and hosting people at our house for meals even so often, but this was another level of hospitality. Many who live close to JHQ do this all the time, but because of where we live, I haven't been asked to.

And, as I've noted many times in the past, an opportunity to serve practically like this provides many other opportunities to interact meaningfully with my colleagues. I had several good conversations that filled my heart with joy (and with things to take to the Lord in prayer).

An overflowing week

Last week was huge—such a contrast to a usual work at my desk at home. I'm glad for all the people I interacted with, though, so thankful.

Monday

Monday was the monthly missionary gathering of OMF missionaries in our area, involving around 50 or more people. This is held at our Japan headquarters on the other side of Tokyo and typically I spend between three and four hours on six or more trains to get there and back. Once I'm there, it's encouraging, but the train journeys can be a bit fraught if you get stuck on heavily populated trains.

The morning's schedule was:

9.30–10.00 arriving, chatting, and coffee/tea

10.00 singing, devotional, announcements, welcomes and farewells.

11.00 morning tea

11.30 prayer time

12.30 BYO lunch

From 1.30 we had a working bee (cleaning/gardening to tidy up the Japan headquarters building).

I got home after 4 pm feeling pretty weary.

Tuesday

At 8.30 I met a friend I said goodbye to in 2016 when she moved back to the US. She's part of my magazine team, so I haven't lost touch with her, but having 1½ hours to sit and talk one-on-one with her at a cafe was such a joy and encouragement. In the few years that she lived in Japan we spent many hours together at prayer meetings and volunteering at school. She's just one of the multitude of friends who have passed through my life in this cross-cultural life. It felt like a redeeming moment to reconnect last week.

The rest of Tuesday was spent working hard at my computer to ensure I could be away from my desk for the rest of the week.

I climbed into a hammock leaning
over a stream!

In the evening I picked up a young Australian friend from the train station who'd be staying with us that night. She'd travelled a long way from western Japan and then gotten a bit lost on Tokyo trains. We were all pretty tired by the time she arrived, so we fed her and then went to bed.

Wednesday – Friday

I did some more desk work in the morning before gathering a carload of ladies around midday to travel to the annual Women in Ministry retreat. Our houseguest was one of my passengers, as well as a missionary neighbour and a friend from church (these days I drive a small car with only four seatbelts).

I also climbed into a tree (with help
from a taller friend)

From then on it was almost constant interaction and activity until Saturday! But, as usual the retreat was a great blessing. 

The worship times were a highlight for me. There's something about singing God's truth into our hearts that is very precious. The worship leader didn't mess around by talking: she lead us through song after song, so the flow wasn't interrupted. I found that it gave me helpful contemplation time. This retreat has been a big "lily pad" in my life over the last 20 years. It's a notable "memory handle" when I think back over those years—I remember various times in my life that this retreat has coincided with other challenging events. 

For example, the retreat in 2011, just days before our lives were sent into turmoil (on this actual day, 11th March) with the triple disaster north of of here. 

I remember the retreat in March 2020 when the magnitude of the pandemic was just starting to dawn on us. I arrived at that particular retreat with the heavy weight of one of my best friend's son who was terminally ill (at 13 years of age) and straight after that women's retreat I hosted a writing retreat that was both incredibly fulfilling as well as incredibly taxing and exhausting. 

Speaker, worship leader with two
visiting Biblical counsellors

I remember the 2021 retreat held online, just a couple of weeks after some devastating news in our family and in the midst of our middle son's traumatic last year of high school.

And 2022, when I was numb after a couple of years of almost no in-person time with people, and when a friend confronted me after noticing my unusual demeanour, I fell apart in her room as I told her about some very heavy stuff within my own family.

That's a sampling of the memories that were coursing through my brain as we worshipped. It was actually pretty therapeutic to reflect on those things as I sang about the goodness and faithfulness of God. Annual events like these nowadays are reminders to me of the friends who are no longer there (usually moved away) and the underlying grief that accompanies me now through life. Remembering, though, that God is still with me and has walked with me through all of the above, and more, was very special.

My other take-away from the retreat is diving into Ephesians 3:17–19. It's a rich passage where Paul's words start to run away from him a bit. Here it is from the Amplified version (not one I usually use, but it was helpful in thinking this through):

And may you, having been [deeply] rooted and [securely] grounded in love, be fully capable of comprehending with all the saints (God’s people) the width and length and height and depth of His love [fully experiencing that amazing, endless love]; and [that you may come] to know [practically, through personal experience]

Meals were plain Japanese-style.

 the love of Christ which far surpasses [mere] knowledge [without experience], that you may be filled up [throughout your being] to all the fullness of God [so that you may have the richest experience of God’s presence in your lives, completely filled and flooded with God Himself]. (Eph. 3:17-19 AMP).

I was particularly noticing that my head knowledge of Christ's love is far surpassed by his actual love for me. I come from a theological background that doesn't emphasis personal experience of God's love, but I think that that is only part of the story in the life of a Christian, a part that I'm still growing in my understanding of and desperately need when I have doubts about my own worthiness and value.

Friday

On Friday at noon, we headed back to Tokyo, and ordinary life. But those in my car got another three hours of enjoyable fellowship in my car. I wasn't the most reliable of drivers, though, because I was tired. I pour myself into interacting people when I get the chance and it wears me out. It was actually hard to concentrate on driving as well as talking with those in the car and I took two wrong turns and one "dodgy" last minute turn! Two stops for caffeine later and I was pleased to finally park my car outside our apartment without any serious incident.

Our Australian guest's flight wasn't until the next day, so she stayed one more night with us. We were a little sad, because, though she'd physically been present at the retreat, she'd missed the entire programme on Thursday as she stayed in bed with a cold. Thankfully she was feeling a bit better by Friday and even able to play card games with us that evening (taught me a new game too—not easy when I was so tired).

Saturday

After we said farewell to our guest and had lunch, we rode our bikes to do a small errand for some other OMF missionaries at the mission's storage facility about 2.5 km from here, and then got groceries on our way home. It wasn't a fun ride: the wind was horribly strong and cold. But this was actually a much needed rest day, so we spent the rest of afternoon and evening lounging in front of the cricket (a rare women's multi-day cricket match, Aust. vs India).

Sunday

This was a pretty usual Sunday: left for church on our bikes at 10 am, ate lunch there, and got home by 3 pm—in time to hang-out online for a couple of hours with our kids.

I'm glad every week isn't like that, but also glad that some weeks are!

Unexpected joy

I had a fun day yesterday. The backdrop was autumn colour and the amazing network of people that life in missionary circles brings you. Add a layer to that: a long car trip within Tokyo made interesting by a couple of well-researched and presented podcasts. Then, later, another sound track: that of a gym full of wrestlers training and conversations with spectators. Even later, the sound of two video calls: one with a son and the other with church members from various countries sharing with one another at a prayer meeting.

Over lunch, at a cafe about 30 km away, I met up with some old friends and some new, all from the US, though almost all had spent lots of time outside that country. Conversation was wide and varied—tea and scones, life in Japan, education of deaf kids in the US (which I was appalled to hear is dreadfully lacking), Deaflympics, Costa Rica, ministry to at-risk women, and how God lead two of those present into their current ministry to missionary families with kids that have special needs. Oh, and we talked about wrestling too!

Most of those present have a child with a disability. Three of those present have a child who is a wrestler.

One family, friends of friends, was in Japan for the Deaflympics with their son who is a pretty talented wrestler, in both GrecoRoman and Freestyle (our boys only did the latter, but the former is also an Olympic sport, and basically is wrestling that only allows you to touch, or use, the upper body). I knew that these people were in town and had earlier hatched a plan to see if we couldn't connect up this young man with the CAJ wrestling team, who are currently training for the first meet of the season. It was a bit of a mad scheme that actually came off and yesterday afternoon I was also able to welcome them to CAJ and the wrestling team.

I ended up sticking around at training for a couple of hours, talking with those who were on the side, and just absorbing the wrestling vibes—remembering the faces we got to know in January and February this year when we hung out with the team for several days. Yes, it is this season again and, our part-time hobby (how else can I describe it?) is digging its claws into us again. On the first Saturday of December I'm helping David run the tournament that CAJ holds each year and we have also been asked to help out with chaperoning the girls team to an away tournament at the end of January (I'm sure I'll have more to share on that closer to the time).

But I had yet another unexpected surprise yesterday: I went looking for crutches for an injured wrestler and was surprised to discover a basketball coach who is Australian and a trained physio. So cool to find just the help we needed on campus already (and an Aussie at that!).

One of my delights is making connections between people who otherwise never would have met. I am not a matchmaker of the Anne of Green Gables sort, but I do love a good introduction that leads to a new friendship or partnership between those who are introduced.

Our day ended as most of our Wednesdays have done in recent months: with a video chat with one of our sons over dinner, followed by an online prayer meeting with more than a dozen people from our church in Japan. It was a bit of a hectic day, but when my head finally hit the pillow, I was full of joy at what God had brought my way.

Seizing the moments this month in Queensland

It's nine days since I last wrote here and I'm definitely feeling more settled and am a little less "discombobulated". Yesterday I cooked two different meals in our friends' kitchen (successfully and without undue stress), I feel like that proves the point!

We've also been trying to keep up with
regular walking. This part of Queensland
has some beautiful spots to walk.

Normal for July is that I'm balancing my online work with the Japan Harvest magazine and our organisation's social media with David being on "summer" holidays. What's not usual is that we're also spending time with people we don't normally see: the friends we're staying with, family, church family, and other friends. It's all very good and worthwhile, but also challenging to get a good balance. I suspect we'll be a little weary when we get back to Japan.

One interesting thing I've noticed is that the time frame that we're here for (5 weeks) means that people who really want to see us are more motivated to make the time, and we're more likely to seize the moment and go for it. Six months or twelve months provides a lot of time to get a better balance (and more rest) but less urgency to get things done. 

Our main purpose of being here is to spend time with our kids, and you can see below that we've been very intentional about that.

Here are some of the things we've done in the last 10 days:

• Had a "State of Origin" party (high profile rugby league game between our state and another) at our youngest son's house with his brother.
• Met my parents for lunch.
• Met different long-term friends on three occasions for lunch or coffee.
• Wendy went to an afternoon tea fun gathering with other women from our home church.
• David’s gone to a couple of men’s coffee mornings.
• A couple of routine medical/optometry visits.
• Drove to 75 km to the north of Brisbane for an open night at a camp that our youngest son is at with Christians from his uni (and another local uni).
• Went to a movie with our middle son and had lunch at his place another day.
• David went to another movie with our hosts and youngest son.
• Most nights we've had dinner with our hosts.

I've been trying to keep up with general work that comes across my desk. Thankfully it's not been too heavy a work-flow this month, but I'm aware that I'm pretty distracted by all of the above. Along with that I've had some online work meetings about magazine and social media matters.

Someone asked me the other day how often we come to Australia, and I had to say that there is no usual now, it's actually in flux as we figure out this new chapter in our lives. But as we go about life here this month, we're thinking about the middle of next year. Our organisation has a key value of ensuring missionaries spend time in their "home" countries. There are five purposes for that:

1. Reporting to churches concerning the ministry/work.

2. Participation in the mobilisation work of the OMF Homeside.

3. Rest and renewal.

4. Reunion with family, friends, and supporting churches.

5. Re-equipping for a more effective ministry.

There used to be a pattern of around four years of service "on the field" and one year in your "sending country" the latter year being called "home assignment". This has been changing in the 25 years we've been working in Japan. Now, for various reasons, it's less common to do one year home assignments and thankfully our organisation is flexing to accommodate. And we're re-evaluating our own plans in the light of our new season without children at home anymore. 

This time next year we're planning to do a short home assignment, probably June and July. There are many reasons for this, which I won't bore you with. But we're hoping it will be a viable ongoing option for the future because the whole upheaval that goes with moving to Australia for six months to a year is a lot. We've done it five times now and are fairly reluctant to do it again, though we know the value of the above points!

We've got two and a half more weeks before we fly back to Japan now and it's probably going to fly by fast with more of the types of social engagements you see above. We're trying to seize the moment and be as present as we can as we spend time with precious people we would not otherwise see.

The value of listening

The other day I got a message from someone in our organisation in Australia who I don't know. Her role is specifically about helping advise our members about their kids, as needed. We've never met. However, somehow she'd discovered this blog and had been reading bits of our story and wanted to know what we've learned along the way, especially in regards to neurodivergence and what help we'd received that she could pass on to others if she needed to.

A photo from a few years back when the
boys all lived with us in Japan.

I asked if she would be interested in hearing our story in detail. I explained that it would just be easier to tell her, because it's a long, complex story—which is pretty normal for neurodivergence, but I suspect ours is more complex because of the cross-cultural elements. It's a story that would take me hours, even as a fast writer, to get down. She agreed, and we talked for nearly two hours. Well, most of that talking was me! She asked some great questions, including some that I've never been asked before. But I think we were both exhausted at the end. 

I have been thinking about that conversation ever since. It was great to be really listened to (she was even taking notes). But it was hard to make sure I included all the bits and pieces. The story went back around 20–25 years and there were so many threads. In the days that followed that conversation, I kept thinking of more things that I could have added! But I think that in the end she got all (and probably much more) than she needed. It made me aware again of the various people God has given me along the way who have listened to me tell parts of our story, with all my struggles, questions, and tears. I'm so thankful. I'm thankful to all who have prayed for us, usually without much information, but just that we were struggling.

It's a huge blessing to be able to look back at all of that and see where our kids are now and that they're all okay. One of the hardest things about being a parent is not knowing the end of the story. Of course all parents have to make decisions without all the information that you feel you need (especially a comparison between the outcomes of two different decisions). Not knowing what long-term impact your decisions will have on your kid is difficult, but when your children aren't thriving or "fitting the norm" it's even harder. One of the extra hard things about being a missionary parent is not having many people around you whose situation is similar to yours and few who understand the nuances of your situation. It can be quite a lonely and difficult place to do parenting and make hard decisions.

So, what's the point of me sharing this? I think, to shed light on the difficulty of being a parent of a kid with neurodivergence and that it is even harder when one is living a missionary life. But most especially to note that the most valuable thing you might be able to do for such a parent is to listen to them. You might not be able to provide any solutions, or point a parent to a place where they can get help, or help them make an important decision, but if they feel heard then that is a help. Parenting kids who have difficulties is a lonely job, it's hard for others to understand the daily challenges you face. If someone is willing to stop and listen to you talk about those challenges, it's a huge encouragement.

Connection at a retreat

I'm in a post-retreat slump. This morning (Monday), I struggled to wake up, despite having a very quiet, restful day on Saturday. And now I'm back at my desk, trying to pick up the pieces after being away from it since last Tuesday. Part of me craves the high of the retreat, the time to worship, to talk with other women, and, to be brutally honest: to swan around without responsibilities!

I guess this slump probably means that I am actually quite tired and need a longer break than just one day. I'm looking forward to going camping next week for four days, and hope that that will result in greater physical refreshing.

Last week was great, I got to escape from Tokyo and daily life to a women's retreat I've been to many times. I always look forward to this retreat with other cross-cultural women, but I don't look forward to coming home and facing the rest of my life afterwards!

This time was a bit different, though. It was great to come home to my husband and not this kind of situation. Home without children remains a very quiet place, something I love, but it was a dramatic change from hanging out with 60 other women for the better part of three days. My husband graciously listened while I spilled out many things from the week that had passed.

Entrance to the centre's onsen,
yes non-private bathing

But you might have gleaned that the retreat was good. It was, in fact, great. I got to go to the venue a day early, ostensibly to help the small leadership team to set up. But I didn't actually do much, mostly because there were so many of us helping that the few things that needed doing didn't take long (or took a lot longer, because...well you know how sometimes it's easier for one person to decide something than a committee!). So the first 24 hours really were very restful, though I did have the remnants of a nasty headache on Tuesday afternoon.

It was so much fun being able to see many people who I haven't seen for two years (the last time I went to this retreat). It's interesting reading about that retreat in 2023 (here). I'd forgotten how heavy the start of that year was. This year my heart was lighter and there were less tears. I'd also "graduated" into the "older woman" category of those who have no children left at home, which felt odd.

Some of these women I never see at any other time other than these retreats. Yet, conversations are deep. I pondered this with one lady over lunch one day. We concluded that most of us feel like outsiders most of the time, but at a retreat like this we are insiders who are almost all living in a foreign land. It's comforting to find this a common ground and fosters strong bonds that form quickly.

Writing workshop ladies talking

Worship through song during the retreat was led by a couple of very down-to-earth ladies and our speaker was also very relatable. The talks were Bible-centred and the retreat started out with a whole session of focussing our eyes on God, in particular focusing on his unfailing love.

Thursday afternoon was free time, plus the option of attending two of four short workshops. Yours truly ran one, on a topic I've never specifically taught before: writing prayer letters (for those who hate doing it). Eight ladies were brave enough to come and I hope they went away with a few ideas to help make this routine ministry task easier. I'm not a natural teacher, and find it uncomfortable to stand up in front of even a small group like this, but I can see ways that I might repeat this (and do a better job).

After that I went for a walk with a very dear friend who I haven't seen since December.

Thursday night was very special: an open worship night. I've noted in the past that at these non-church interdenominational events I often feel more free. I've worshipped in conservative circles all my life and am happy there. So worshipping with people who are far more expressive is different, but good for my soul, I think. We mostly sang, and towards the end dissolved into a lengthy people of spontaneous micro-prayers. It was exceptional. 

The fun ride home

On Friday we left for home straight after lunch. I squeezed into a fun car full of six women and our luggage. We had a great afternoon, you guessed it—talking all the way home (about four hours, as we gradually dropped of ladies along the way, and only got a tiny bit lost along the way)!

During the week I had all sort of encounters. Here's a tiny taste:

I met a neighbour I didn't know I had. She and her husband work in a Chinese ministry at a sister church to ours and live about five houses from us.

I caught up with the mum of one of my youngest son's best friends. Turns out our sons had been talking (Australia to US) just that afternoon!

There were two other Aussies at the retreat. One with the Salvos and the other on a working holiday visa, I chatted with both.

At various times over the week I was able to share bits of our recent journey with neurodivergence, autism, and mental illness. And about journeying with kids into young adult years, especially about the bumps and challenges we've faced. I rubbed shoulders with mums who are ahead of me on this journey, and others who are facing up to their kids finishing high school soon, as well as women who are still in the midst of figuring out how to get their kids an education in this foreign land. We all learn from one another and it's a joy.

I met women who "know" me through my writing: this blog and through my work with the Japan Harvest magazine. That's always a little scary. What do people know about me? What do they think they know? Many who know me for my role as a managing editor make assumptions about my educational background that aren't true. No, I don't have a university degree in writing (or editing, though I've discovered that few editors do, most learn on the job like I did). But it's always exciting to hear from those who have really enjoyed the content of the magazine. My roomie was busy reading the latest issue (I don't think she was trying to impress me).

I did a lot of listening and a lot of talking. And, as usual, came away wishing that I'd done more listening and been slower to speak.

Last week on Facebook, I shared this article about the value of cross-cultural relationships. I could probably write a whole blog post as I bounce off ideas that the two authors shared, but here's a tiny portion as it relates to the friendships amongst women I meet at English-speaking retreats in Japan.

Cross-cultural friendships may often lack the natural reference points that ease our interactions with people of our own background, but they do have the advantage of creating a sense of self-expansion. This is the sense that we are growing as people...

Self-expansion can come in many forms. It may come from an exposure to new points of view, or an introduction to new and exciting experiences that we had never encountered alone...we are constantly learning from each other...

Connections across countries . . [may help] to loosen some of the shackles on our thinking so that we are more receptive to new ways of viewing the world—a more flexible and open-minded attitude that encourages innovation. (David Robson and Alessia Franko, "'I call her my Italian sister': The power of cross-cultural friendships")

So, I think that these friendships are very helpful. They take me beyond my usual thoughts and experiences and stretch me into someone who has a bigger experience and broader mind. I love getting outside our organisation and church and hearing about how other people and organisations do life. It helps keep me realistic about the various challenges we face in our own lives. I'm already looking forward to next year's retreat!

Coming "home"

The day after our son's wedding we farewelled our two younger sons as they flew back to Brisbane and then worshipped with my parents and two close friends at the church of our son and new daughter-in-law. They, of course, weren't there. 

We briefly farewelled my parents after church. When I say bye to someone I often mentioned something about when I'll see them again; this time we were able to say: see you later this year. Our plan is to visit for a short time in south-east Queensland during July. Mum asked if we had dates and I laughed. Despite the blog post I'd shared the week before about looking forward to 2025, we'd barely thought beyond that weekend!

Home, with a new tablecloth!

Then had lunch with our friends and farewelled them. I wasn't ready for the farewells, but they happened anyway. We then gathered our stuff and left town, heading four hours north to Cairns. Australia is a huge place with long spaces inbetween many places (Tasmania being the exception to that). If you've been to our native land and haven't figured that out, then you haven't seen much of it! It was a tiring journey, but we listened to radio commentary of the Aussie women playing cricket against England. We cruised into a very quiet looking Cairns around dinner time, watched more cricket as we wound down in the evening, and crashed on the bed.

The next morning we were moving again: to the airport and back to a chilly Tokyo. The trickiest part was always going to be getting back home from the airport when we were so tired. We'd parked in long-term parking and once again cricket on the (internet) radio helped us on our journey! (Yes, we're cricket-mad, and not ashamed at all.) 

The most immediate culture shock we had was figuring out what speed to drive! Yep, we've driven for nearly 25 years in Japan and in 13 days forgot that most driving is slower in Japan than in Australia. Quickly sorted that and we were home in 1 ½ hours by about 8 pm. It felt odd, but also good to walk back into our apartment. It's at the same time still new-to-us and very home-like. We moved around like we were in a dream, reminding ourselves that the most urgent thing was being prepared for David to leave before 8 am the next morning (Tuesday) for work, and getting some sleep.

Some Christmas presents from our
sons that we received before
the wedding.

I predicted that it would take several days to get back into the groove, and that is exactly what happened. By Saturday we were exhausted and very thankful for a quiet day with nothing at all on the schedule.

Now those 13 days in Australia seem like a dream, except that every now and then there are reminders from our time there: like photos, messages from our new daughter-in-law, and things that we brought back with us. As usual, things have moved on in our absence, so it has been a delight to have a few friends here demanding to see photos from our time away!

So, we're going through the motions, but sometimes my thoughts and soul are still catching up with where my physical body is. It remains true that the last 12 months have contained much change for us, and I think I'm still finding my feet in this new phase of life. Please pray that I'll be patient with myself and people around me as I walk through this.

Another crazy week: but I'm thankful

I'm starting to realise that having a few less responsibilities means I'm more flexible! So I'm able to take up short-term opportunities more easily and have the space to recover from them.

This last week I've done a few not-usual things and it's been crazy busy. In fact this is the first time in seven days that I've actually sat at my desk.

David's office where we spent several hours on
Friday sorting wrestlers into weight classes,
recording their names, and setting up the
 initial bouts.

Friday and Saturday were crazy busy, but fun. David and I did the admin side of the school's wrestling tournament. We had 250 wrestlers on campus (a large number for our league). The gym was packed to the rafters. We held a middle school tournament, as well as a full raft of male and female weight brackets for the high schoolers. It's very hard to easily describe what we did because it included so many moving pieces and a lot of copying of names. As bouts happened we had to add those results to the tree diagram (called a bracket) and then create the scoring sheet for the new matches with the relevant wrestlers. We problem solved and answered many questions. One of the most satisfying things personally was solving problems by tracking down wrestlers whose bouts had slipped through the cracks somehow. We've benefited from others doing this for our sons over the last 13 years, so it was great to be able to serve others in this way. I'm thankful it was just those two days, though!

The busyness didn't stop after Saturday...but here are some photos to show you something of the weekend (see more about my week after the photos).

CAJ campus was stunning over the weekend...
but I spent most of my time inside!

No filter here (or in the one above)!

Wrestlers, coaches, and supporters everywhere!
The noise level was very loud...for 12 hours.

I got 20 minutes out of the gym
at lunchtime and I went for a short 
walk around campus. This
ginko tree was stunning.

This was admin central: where we spent about 12 hrs on
Saturday. We had several helpers, including the veteran
coach (Dan Rudd) who did announcements
until he ran out of energy mid afternoon. Coach Rudd
is the one who taught our eldest son in the earliest
days of his wrestling career (and answered so many
of our early questions).

I didn't see much wrestling...we didn't have the 
best seats in the house! Past all the people in
this photo is a CAJ wrestler getting his gold medal, he's
a former long-time teammate of our youngest son.

And the days moved onwards: Sunday morning was our usual time at church with lunch afterwards, then chatting to our sons over an hour or two. 

We had overnight guests on Sunday night, but due to their short stay (34 hrs) in Japan they had limited data on their phones to communicate with us as they travelled from the airport and a lack of on-hand cash meant they had difficulty buying train tickets. We live 1 ½ hrs from the airport, so it isn't an easy drop-in, but they were determined. We waited an hour for them at the train station. Thankfully we could pop into the cafe there for some warmth as the temperature was around 5C. It turned into a late night! The next day I showed them around the school and our neighbourhood and they treated us to lunch. We've had very few supporters visit us in recent years, so it was a delight to have this couple visit.

Another great Japan Harvest issue completed!

On Tuesday I went into the Japan Evangelical Missionary Association (JEMA) office to help pack magazines. A friend from CAJ-parent era met me there and we caught up while stuffing magazines into packets. That was an excellent use of time and I felt refreshed afterwards. I left a little early to get back to school for (you guessed it): more wrestling! Just an hour as a spectator, this time.

Yesterday I had another new thing going on: I'm hosting a short term worker and I met her for coffee and to talk about her involvement with social media, her weekly schedule, etc. I then took her to meet a Japanese friend of mine at the JEMA office, we ate lunch and packed more magazines. Another really good use of time because while doing a manual job like that there is much time for conversation.

It's been a lot. I ended up on my bed before dinner on both Monday and Wednesday. I'm really tired! Today is an office day (and a short grocery run). I'm grateful for the peace here at home and that while I've been gone things have been chugging along in the two teams I work with.

Thankfully it looks like the coming weeks aren't quite so hectic. It's just under three weeks till we travel to Australia for our son's wedding, so hopefully we'll be a bit more rested and able to enjoy that time.

A very encouraging week

Last week was very full. I was looking forward to it, as well as wondering how I would fare. I'm thankful to be past it, but also see that I managed to make it through without falling in a heap, which is really encouraging.

On Monday we had our monthly regional gathering for our mission. Around 50 people joined together to sing, pray, fellowship, and eat together. We heard, and prayed thoroughly, about some business matters. 

After a short break mid afternoon, five of us (plus a facilitator) jumped into our social media team retreat in the same location. We had a formal time of getting to know you, and then went out to dinner together. I was pretty "whacked". I struggled with a headache all afternoon and by dinner time it was making me feel woozy, but I managed to do all that I needed to do. I did head to bed at 8.30, though.

The next day we gathered after breakfast and spent the whole day thinking about things like decision making, team characteristics, some big picture questions about what we do and how we do it, and spent time growing in creativity. It was a big day that we followed with dinner out together, and an evening of creativity.

I knew this team was much younger than me, but it was confronting to spend significant time together and feel very middle-aged (the next youngest person is 13 years younger than me and three of our team are in their 20s or early 30s)! However it was a really good time. We are a remote team and most of us don't know one another well. I've learned over the 14 years I've worked in remote teams that trust is a huge component. If you don't trust one another, it makes your job far more difficult. This was a great time for building trust.

It's also a team that has undergone much change recently, and there is more change and uncertainty in the upcoming months. This level of team change is very challenging. I'm so thankful we had an experienced "team builder" help us as I'm certain I wouldn't have had the knowledge to do what he did, and certainly having someone outside the team to run it was a good move too. This retreat is something we've been talking about doing for a few years now, but the pandemic put a stop to a lot of that kind of initiative (and how often have I heard "but the pandemic..." uttered recently when people are reflecting on the last five years!?).

I got home from the retreat on Wednesday, in time for my usual mid-afternoon coffee. I unpacked, did a couple of "time sensitive" work things, and then collapsed on the lounge for the rest of the evening.

Thursday was a day I had carefully kept clear of other responsibilities. I didn't have high hopes for my capacity for work that day, but surprised myself and others by ticking off (US Eng: checking off) quite a number of editing jobs.

Our table

Friday was entirely taken up by an event we've been anticipating for over 12 months. Last year as we finalised our packing and moving, we realised we had a number of things that others could find useful. So we didn't throw them all out, we kept a few boxes of stuff and stored them, planning to try to sell them at Friday's school bazaar. At the bazaar we rented a table and filled it with stuff we were trying to get rid of. Between 10am and 4pm we sold quite a few things! We also sold all 200 pieces of fudge that I'd made. But it was also a great ruse for having our own "quiet" spot in the school gym where we could sit and greet friends who wandered past. I had so many conversations with friends, many of whom I've known for a number of years. It was a great encouragement to my soul.

It was fantastic to see the school community coming to life again "post pandemic" (yep, that word again). In October 2019, for various reasons, CAJ ended its long tradition of "Thrift Shop". That tradition had, twice a year, filled the gym with donated goods and provided us with not only many cheap household goods, toys, clothes, camping gear, and other miscellaneous items, but many hours of volunteering there over the years provided me with community and friends. That October was supposed to be the start of a new tradition, but any forward momentum got interrupted just six months later by a pandemic, and no more school bazaars happened until October 2022. It's taken a while to get back to a sense of wider community at the school, at least from my outsider position as a mum and teacher's spouse. So Friday was wonderful to behold.

These brand new size 28 slides didn't sell, would you like them?

We also are looking for a runner to sell these "spikes" to.
They've been used a couple of times (also a pandemic casualty).

Friends catching up! Such joy.

A little bit against what I thought was wise, social interaction continued through the weekend. On Friday night we watched a movie with our camping friends at their house. On Saturday, David helped rearrange one of our mission's storage places and had lunch with his two co-workers. I had a haircut and finally did some grocery shopping. That evening we met a couple visiting from the US, a couple who have listened to us and helped us through some tough times in the last few years.

On Sunday we visited another new church and to our surprise knew many people there. It was an English-speaking service and our various English-speaking networks in Japan all were represented. We also ran into an OMF colleague and gave her a lift back to ours for coffee before her next appointment. Straight after that we chatted with our sons for over an hour. 

Phew! I am really surprised that I am not more exhausted than I am today (Monday). Perhaps I'm getting back to some kind of new normal level of energy?

Whenever the topic of leaving Japan comes up, I'm reminded of this wide group of people I only know because I've lived my life here. When the time comes to move on, it will be a sad day, though I know that this is a mobile group of people who I will probably gradually say goodbye to as they move on over the coming years anyway. 

But for now I'm just thankful for a full heart from all this wonderful interaction over the last week.

Sole camping trip for 2024

I've been away from my desk for much of the last 2 ½ weeks and have been playing catch-up this week, but I am determined to do a little bit of my own writing today. Last week we went camping for three nights in Fukushima Prefecture, about 250 km north of Tokyo. It was our first time to spend any time at all in this prefecture, aside from driving through on the expressway. 

It's the first time we've been camping in 19 months...we were looking forward to this trip so much! It's been really hard to accept the reality this week that our trip is over. It was a much needed break. We've been going pretty constantly since we got back to Brisbane in early May from our long motorhome sojourn.

We had a spectacular time. The first time to go camping with none of the participants under 20 (in fact all four of us are a long way past 20)! It was very quiet. We were literally the only people there in this large campground. After 4pm there wasn't even a caretaker around.

But back to the start of the trip: getting there involved over four hours of driving, first on Tokyo's congested ordinary roads, then an expressway, and finally over an hour through the Japanese countryside—over mountains and valleys and through tunnels. It was our first time to drive at 120 km/hr in Japan. I took a photo of this dual-speed sign to give us time to read it...and yes, we were allowed to drive this fast in our little car.

We stopped for lunch at a roadside "service area", one of the joys of travelling long distance in a car in Japan. There is usually many food options, as well as lots of clean toilets. We were already enjoying being away and hanging out that we took quite a long break at this point! Eventually someone pointed out that we still had more driving and a campsite to set up, so we got going again.

The countryside we drove through was, as usual, gorgeous, especially to eyes that have been in Tokyo for months. The layers upon layers of mountains still amaze us Aussies from a wide-flat land!

When we considered what car we would buy, a key requirement was the capacity to carry all our camping gear. This little car did a magnificent job. And we discovered that with no extra passengers it was really easy to pack the back of this, which is basically a box when you lower the back seats. Of course we had less gear, but still, we could see out the back of the car when fully packed and that has not always been a given!

It was wonderful having three nights away: it meant two full days without travelling. We had a very relaxed time. We played games, read, napped, strolled, and the one who brought his bike went for several long rides. Our friends introduced us to a beanbag game called Cornholes (US game) and we introduced them to a card game called Take7.

And of course fire featured a lot. This campsite sported a big flat place where people had previously had fires, so, with no rule saying we couldn't, we gathered up wood lying around and had two big fires on the last two nights. Not just entertainment, but we cooked our evening meals there too. Cooking for four wasn't hard, but the biggest difference was how little washing up there was for just the four of us: we were almost finished before we started. A big difference to when we've camped with 10 or more people.

This simple meal was so delicious.
Thin-sliced pork and baked veggies
in foil.

There was plenty of nature to enjoy. I didn't take photos of the bees, mozzies, or bees, or the vast numbers of "stink" bugs but I did capture the more photogenic dragonflies who loved to land on our ropes and car antenna. 

It was a pretty cheap place to stay. Just $AU42 for three nights for each couple. For that we had water, as much space as we wanted, flushable toilets, and a place where we could wash dishes. Ironically the toilet seats were heated. The toilet pedestals were pretty much the cleanest thing in the whole place—the hut they were in was full of bugs and spiderwebs, though nothing too big (I've seen much worse in this land). The showers were also very clean and open 24 hrs a day. They cost $AU1 for five minutes, which is plenty of time. Alas there were no hooks or benches in the showers, but thankfully there was an actual door between the shower room and changing area, so our stuff didn't get wet.

You might wonder how we find these places. It's a pretty simple Google Maps search. We only stay at places that have sufficient information online for us to judge if we're happy about trying them (usually a simple webpage). The translations on Google reviews on these campsites are sometimes illuminating and often entertaining. This one had a lot of chatter about "Kevins" and I briefly wondered...until David clarified that "cabin" in Japanese is sometimes spelled ケビン or literally "kebin"! There were indeed a lot of unoccupied "Kevins", that looked great on the outside, but I don't think there was kitchens or showers in the Kevins. We knew that we were getting a better deal in our tents. Yes: much cheaper, potentially cleaner (according to the reviews), and more fun. I mean you don't get to play with fire in a Kevin! 

Gotta love a good fern!

Beautiful squishy moss.

One area we drove through was obvious a dairy farming area, which is quite unusual in Japan. They had a farm that was set up for tourists and we stopped there for a yummy lunch and ice cream on the way home.

Yep, a dairy farming themed area!
This is a post box at the local convenience store

Ice cream with our long-time camping friends.

The farm shop...speaks for itself.

And a random bus! We could see the road that
went past the campsite and these between-village
buses went by a few times each day.
And it's a sign that you're relaxing
when you have time to notice the 
occasional bus driving past (it wasn't 
a busy road).

One more dragonfly because they are so beautiful!

This was the view up a nearby hill. It's a valley
that contains both a village and yellow rice fields.

We think this pond is where most of the mozzies were
coming from. Because it's well into autumn I definitely
underestimated the mosquitoes.