Unfortunately, this is an M rated post

I recently received the January edition of Australian Women's Weekly (the subscription was a present last year). I was shocked to find a naked woman on the cover. In the article inside, Deborah Hutton tells us why she agreed to pose naked. 

"The reason I agreed to pose nude for The Weekly is to celebrate that I'm 50 and my body is the best it can be...For me, it's much more than just being naked on a cover. I fear there is too much emphases on how thin women ought to be and not enough on health and the acceptance of who we are, with all our imperfections...It's a tasteful photograph, of someone who is comfortable in her skin. It's a celebration for me of not shying away form the fact I'm 50, a time most women fear, as society dictates the best years are behind them."

Why, I ask, is it necessary to pose naked on a magazine cover to prove that you're comfortable in your skin? Is that the best way to address the issue of an overemphasis on youth and thinness? Isn't it selling women short? Exposing those parts of our bodies which should be reserved for viewing and enjoyment only by those who love us and have committed to keep doing so is only achieving a cheapening of who we are. Rather than helping the issue of an overemphasis on how we look, it is feeding into the same issue. It's saying that how we look is important, important enough to take someone's clothes off and show off their 50 y.o. body.


Did anyone stop to think how this affects the others who will see this magazine cover? After all this magazine is on magazine stands all over the country, and especially next to the places where young children queue with their mums to buy their groceries. And women whose marriages are devastated because of pornography. How will they feel about this "celebration"? And us mums who are trying to bring up our boys with a semblance of decency towards the opposite sex. How are we supposed to do that when women are throwing their naked bodies out there for all to see?


The "tasteful photograph" presumably means they've stopped short at showing all the woman's breasts and no pubic hair, but really.


Last time we were in Australia I was shocked that many women (even Christians) were very happy to show cleavage and bras. In fact it was hard to buy clothes that totally covered that part of your anatomy (especially if you have a short torso). So I guess I shouldn't be too surprised by this. And I could go on. But...


I'll stop before I become incoherent.

Cold and my inaugural wrestling meet

It isn't as cold here as where we first lived in Japan (Sapporo). I think they had something like -9 this morning. We only had -2 (Celcius). But that is cold enough. The unheated parts of our house were about 4 degrees. My profile photo for this blog is this one on the left. 

That just makes me feel cold right now. I'm thinking that this other one might be more suitable.






Last night we went for my first taste of wrestling. The high school wrestling team had a meet with another international school in CAJ's gym, so we went along to support them. It was fun, especially the more eventful wrestles. Some of it reminded me of rugby league, especially when one wrestler got lifted off the floor and almost dumped on his head. Looked like a football tackle to me! And another bout was between two guys who were over 200lbs (90kg). This one was quite exciting as the CAJ wrestler pinned his opponent in a dramatic moment. The title of that play we were made to read at high school "Let the Big Men Fly," kept running through my mind.


I'm sensing this is just the beginning of my career as a wrestling mum. Our 12 y.o. has joined the team this year. Actually he is 50% of the team, middle schoolers have to choose between wrestling and basketball. Basketball is the more glamorous sport at our school, even though they have to go to early morning practises (before the sun gets up). 


Our son is really enjoying it and all reports I've heard is that he's doing well and has potential. There is a lot to learn, it seems. You might think, Wrestling – lots of brawn, not much brains, but actually that isn't true. They have to problem solve constantly as they pit themselves against their opponent. And they get into some very awkward positions that they have to try and pull themselves out of. It calls for a good portion of persistence too, giving up easily is not a good trait for a wrestler. Anyway, I am no expert...a mere beginner spectator. 


On Saturday we're taking the boys to watch their brother wrestle. Last night was just a short taste (only an hour), but Saturday we'll be there several hours. Our boys were fascinated last night, we'll see how they last the distance on Saturday. 

Pondering my flaws

Well, what to write about today? I'm doing a great job of messing things up, it seems. The older I get the more mistakes I seem to be making.


Just yesterday I put my foot in my mouth as a self-proclaimed American accent expert and then I generalised! Not the first time I've offended Americans by generalising about them and their country. Sorry to all my American readers out there.


Last week I shot off an email to the designer of the magazine I edit. It detailed changes I thought needed making in the about-to-be-sent-to-the-printer magazine. Turns out, I was out of line. In fact editing is all about finding mistakes — my own and others. And then you add more than one editor together, thrown a few writers in and you have disagreement, sometimes major disagreement! Actually, editing this magazine has probably gotten me in more hot water more frequently than anything else I've done in the last decade. Sigh.


I'm still recovering from a couple of mistakes I made in 2010 and discovered last January when I made yet another several mistakes with the same person. The mess that those mistakes made hurt me badly and isn't going away quickly.


Which leads me to another aspect to my personality that has come in focus for me again this week. My tendency to persevere. This, like most personality traits, has positive and negative sides to it.


Positively it has enabled me to stick with difficult situations longer than I might otherwise have done (for example, being a missionary in Japan). It means that I've gained competence in some things that I might not have except that I've persevered (e.g. piano). It means I don't need much external motivation. It means that goals I set, I often achieve and that if I set my mind to something, I usually manage it if I'm not thwarted by some other factor. That's why learning Japanese has been such a frustration to me, because, I didn't get the results that I, or anyone else wanted.


The negative side of perseverance is that it is hard to let go. Hard to let go of an argument, hard to accept that something hasn't been completed to my satisfaction (an element of perfectionism, I guess). Hard to accept that I cannot fix a relationship if the other person doesn't want it fixed. It is hard to accept giving up. It means that I can push my boys too far. This was particularly evident in homeschooling, but is something I have to continually try to keep in check when parenting. It means I can get stuck on something that in the big scheme of things is unimportant. Add to it my tendency to be introspective, and you can get some serious mental messes.


Sigh. Mistakes, messes, difficulty quitting. 


My boys were pondering heaven the other day. When I ponder my flaws, it makes me sad, but it also makes me long for heaven, for a time when I'll not have any flaws or internal struggles anymore.

American spelling list

Our son brought home this spelling list this week. This is an American spelling list, can you tell? (Hint, all these words have "aw" sounds in them.)


because
talk
lawn
frost
dawn
paw
thaw
caught
across
stalk

A shock, one year ago

This day last year the town I grew up in was cut in half by an unexpected flash flood, likened by many to an "inland tsunami". My home town is 691m above sea level and over 120km from the coast. Occasionally they get tiny flash floods, but that usually only cuts a couple of roads. I don't think anyone has ever seen a flood like this in that town. 


That afternoon I innocently flicked the computer on and checked Facebook, not expecting any drama. Therefore it was shocking to see cars and shipping containers being flipped around on the main streets of my home town! It gutted the main shopping precinct of the town, but thankfully not too many houses. Still, more than a dozen died. Here was my blog post at the time.


Here's a short video summary:
http://video.couriermail.com.au/2184861262/A-flood-of-memories
I found this timeline online (from The Telegraph) for the period leading up to the flood:

September-November 2010: After years of devastating drought, the La Nina weather phenomenon drenches the northeastern state of Queensland with its wettest spring on record.

December 2010: Torrential rains and flooding damage crops and close a coal mine. Six people die, including three trapped in cars and a girl, 17, whose foot is stuck between rocks as the waters rise.

December 25: Tropical Cyclone Tasha makes landfall near Cairns in the early hours of Christmas Day, bringing rainfall of six to 10 inches.

December 28: Disaster declared in several southern Queensland towns, where flooding prompts mass evacuations. A 50-year-old man dies after being swept off a footbridge by floodwaters.

December 30: The town of Bundaberg north of Brisbane experiences its worst flooding in decades, with about 300 homes inundated.

January 2: Floods affect 22 towns as the crisis reaches "biblical" proportions, according to the Queensland state treasurer. A woman dies after her car is swept from the road.

January 3: Residents of Rockhampton flee their homes as the city of 75,000 is almost entirely cut off by rising floodwaters. The raging waters claim two more lives.

January 5: Officials say floods have inundated or cut off 40 townswhile dozens of coal mines are flooded.

January 8: Police recover the body of a young woman who drowned after going swimming with friends, bringing the death toll to 11.

January 10: Nine die including four children and 59 are missing when flash floods smash the mountainside town of Toowoomba (Wendy's home town) and surrounding areas.

January 11: Officials warn the death toll is likely to rise as continuing rain and washed-away roads hamper rescue efforts.

This was published before Ipswich and the state capital Brisbane flooded later in the week. And the suburb we'd lived in only six months previously had their entire business district under metres of water.

Needless to say, this was a shocking start to the year. Little did we know of the shocks that were waiting for us later in the year.  Shocks that were even greater than these.

Nevertheless, Queensland had their own tragedy this time last year. There is no point in comparing it to any one else's tragedy. Lives lost, are lives lost. Each one precious.

Today's challenges

Today I lead a prayer meeting for seventh grade parents. It seemed to go well. Because of the public holiday and the lunch following our meeting we had a good turnout, 50% dads!


The lunch with 18 other parents of 7th grade went really well, better than I expected. A special thanks to the B family for the Muscle "jan ken" ice breaker! I did enjoy the time we spent together. Unfortunately much of the potato salad I made to take came home with me . . . guess I'll just have to eat it myself (kids don't like it and David's trying to be good for his cholesterol's sake).


In between the above two meetings, I dropped into the school library and asked the librarian to go on a quest for me. To find books that I can read to all of our kids after dinner. I've written about this activity before (for example, here), but I'm a bit stuck at present for books that will hold the attention of our 6 y.o., and yet not bore our 12 1/2 year old! She looked excited by the challenge! We love you Lois.


Then I jumped straight into a Skype magazine editorial meeting. So much going on now! We met for more than two hours and I'll have a fair job sorting out the meeting notes tonight. We're introducing new things to the magazine, changing staff and responsibilities, organising new events (writer's workshops), etc. It is a challenging, but exciting time. I'm praying that it will all go smoothly and that the end result with be a better magazine with less stressed staff and writers.


Now I get to the business end of the day (homework, dinner, showers, bed) and feel a little out of breath, mentally speaking.


But on the physical front, maybe I need to get back to the gym. My knee has been a bit dodgy for over a month now (slight strain, I think) and so I've been trying to rest it over the Christmas-New Year break. I really miss the exercise, though. So tomorrow I'm going to go back as best I can without over-stressing my knee. Anyone wish they were younger and their body healed faster?


It still amuses me when people find out I have three boys, they instantly assume that I'm very busy. Well, it is true that I'm busy, but as you can see, most of what has kept me busy today hasn't been the three boys! Although you could legitimately argue that I've spent most of the day at school and I wouldn't have done that except for having boys at school.


But for now . . . homework, anyone?

Coming-of-Age Day

Tomorrow is Coming-of-Age Day in Japan. It is for all who have turned 20 since the previous 2nd of April and before the coming 1st of April. Coming-of-age ceremonies are very traditional in Japan. The first known celebration was 714 AD (although the age has changed, it used to be younger)! 


These days the young people dress up, girls most often wearing a special kimono and having their hair done at a beauty salon. They then attend ceremonies held by the local city hall. There are some beautiful photos here.


The day can also involve a visit to a shrine as talked about here. And then an after-party with friends. Here is another little article about it, if you want to go and have a look.


It might surprise you to find out that Japanese can't legally vote, drink, or smoke until they turn 20. The whole thing surprised a 20 y.o. Indian girl in our church. She arrived three months ago to do a year exchange at a university and speaks hardly any Japanese. When they broached the idea of her joining in our church's blessing ceremony today, she laughed, having considered herself an adult since she moved out of home at 17 to begin her tertiary education in India. But she gamely joined the three other young people at the front of the church while our pastor read words of wisdom from the Bible and prayed over them.


I think it is great that that our church embraces these traditional Japanese ceremonies. They also bring the children up on Children's Day and pray for them too (this usually happens at a Shrine). 


It is a public holiday in Japan tomorrow, but not a CAJ holiday. Oh well. But we seventh grade parents have taken advantage of this situation and are having our annual parents lunch. Lots of people came last year, so it will be interesting to see how many turn up this time. Usually I feel terribly outnumbered and lost, there are not very many Caucasian parents in the class and many of the parents feel shy speaking English (and that's what they feel they must speak to me). But we have 10 new families this year, so perhaps it will be a little different tomorrow. I sometimes wonder if it doesn't help that I'm married to a staff member. Somehow that marks me out as a bit different...but I'm wandering now. Time to finish.