Wide angle lens Phase II (1994 - 2010)*

Throughout this phrase my role changed multiple times, or had multiple layers added to it. In retrospect it looks quite complicated! I've called titled it "Wide angle lens" as my focus didn't centre in on anything specifically (except, perhaps, my kids as being a mum was a big part of this phase).

Sub-phase A. Change (1994-2005)

This is a snapshot of me towards the end of our first term in Japan. We
were in a church-plant situation and I was trying to juggle motherhood,
language and culture learning as well as learning about ministering in
a Japanese church. The lady pictured is still a friend: we caught up briefly
when I was in Sapporo in April.

At the start of this phase I was a single university student, freshly returned to Australia from a short-term trip by the end of it, 16 years later, I was married and the mum of three boys, ministering in Japan. Needless to say that this phase included many more changes and transitions than the first two decades of my life.

I moved from being a student to being an Occupational Therapist and then a wife then a mum and homemaker. I moved on to be a missionary in Japan and language student but still a mum and homemaker!), then a SAHM (stay-at-home-mum). I moved from living in a dorm situation to living alone, then living with a flatmate, then a husband. And then, in the first eight years of our marriage, transitioned gradually to living with my own family of five. I moved from Brisbane to a small country town back to Brisbane and then to Sapporo and eventually Tokyo. Eight moves in total. 

Transition was something I learned a lot about in this phase. One big time of learning this was from 1997 to 1999: I had multiple jobs in this period as I worked in several locations as a locum OT (substitute for others on leave) before quitting OT to take care of our newborn.

Change was not something I was good at at the start of this phase, but it was a time of growth and I gradually grew better at being adaptable.

Sub-phase B. Furnaces (1994-2006)

A couple of weeks after our second son was born: we went to an OMF
conference. This photo captures the "wildness" that characterised
our eldest son in these early years.

I won't put gloss on this. It was not an easy phase, easily the most difficult years of my life so far are contained this period. There were many isolation and testing periods during this wide-angle lens phase:

Our second apartment in Japan, not too long before we moved out to
go on our first home assignment (judging by all the boxes lining the wall).

• I failed 12-week OT practical placement in my last year at uni (and subsequent had to do a humbling repeat prac.).
• I experienced significant disillusionment with my church after the short-term trip.
• After graduating I moved to a small country town where I lived and worked alone and had little fellowship with others like me (single, 20s, educated, conservative evangelical Christian). It was a lonely, low time, yet one where I thrived in the variety and responsibility I had at work.
• I experienced some challenging work situations that included: rejection, non-permanent positions, and having to work in a variety of specialities I wasn't knowledgeable in.
• Mum of young children: didn't have easy kids and wasn't greatly gifted as a young-child mum. Though I love and greatly desired children, the reality of motherhood was difficult.
• I found (and still find) language learning exceptionally hard. Again, not an area I'm gifted in and something that significantly eroded my self confidence. Discontentment with this area of my life is something that still plagues me.
• We had a sick baby in the second half of first term, that involved two hospitalisations and several more scares.
• The start of second term (2005) was also difficult: we moved to Tokyo where I knew almost no one, David started full-time at CAJ (after having worked from home for the previous five years), and I had three little ones.

I learned so much during this time about what I was good at and not so good at, learned to say no, and how poisonous comparison is. But possibly my biggest lesson learned in this period was about God's provision and how to depend on God, rather than people.

Sub-phase C. Questioning my call (2005-2006)

My second term was especially a time of questioning my call to Japan. My husband had clearly landed in the place God had been preparing him for, but I was still spending most of my day with our children and without the abilities to do anything much else to further the gospel in Japan.

Through a variety of means (read about that in more detail here), God answered my plea to understand why he'd brought me to Japan by leading me gradually into writing and eventually editing and the ministries I'm doing now.

At the heart of my call to writing and editing is a desire to help others get their stories out—to communicate with those who have not lived as missionaries. I'm so excited to be doing that now! (Even if I don't get especially excited about making decisions about commas and capitalisation.)

Sub-phase D. Learning new skills (2007-2010)

The writing workshop I went to in Hong Kong.

After God gave me direction into writing, I spent time learning how to write better. This process also taught me how to edit (my work and others) and much about the publishing world that would be useful later on. I went to a writing workshop and did a writing course. I began my personal blog during this period and also began submitting articles to magazines for publication and some were published.



After a future ministry door opened to be involved in editing the Japan Harvest magazine, I also went to a magazine editing workshop.

Boundary event (2010)
In the middle of 2010 we returned to Tokyo from HA and we began the seven-year period when all my children were at school. This marked the beginning of me being able to work more intently on ministry outside the home (though most of it happened from a computer in our dining room).

*This is the second of three posts I've written about my life as an assignment for a course I did in April, processing my life in a specific timeline format. The first post is here.