Permission to spend?

I found a blog post last month that aired some taboo topics. It's covers areas that most missionaries secretly struggle with.

These permissions are areas other people
struggle with too. For example, my brother-in-law
is a farmer and he needs permission to rest. Our
camping trip at Easter with him and his family was
such a time when he felt able to rest. It was fabulous.

(This post) might reduce the pressure that becomes toxic to missionaries. Sometimes that pressure is self-inflicted—derived from the unachievable standards they levy on themselves. And sometimes it’s imposed by supporters and churches who mean well, but fail to measure the human toll of a life in ministry. 

So the onus of responsibility is twofold: on the missionaries who self-blame and self-shame and on the networks that back them, sometimes piling unreasonable expectations on people who work in circumstances they can’t fully fathom.

The author encourages missionaries to accept permission to: 

• be confused (about things like support, why the work seems to bear little fruit)
• be flawed
• rest 
• spend (this is one that I struggle with deeply)
• quit (haven't gone here yet, but the concept that God may call you somewhere else, even back to your passport country)

You really need to go and read the article for yourself: http://www.oscar.org.uk/oscaractive/articles/phoenix.htm