This week I heard about a birthday party for one of our youngest's classmates. He gave me some of the details (there was no formal invitation), but then he casually added,
"I might not be invited anymore, because there are too many kids coming."So I emailed the boy's parents, who I know. The father confirmed the next morning that indeed they did have too many children to cope with in their small apartment, and would it be okay if they invited our son over on another date?
I was a little surprised, but having been in this situation before myself, understood perfectly.
So I told the boys about it at breakfast. None of them showed any sign of surprise. They all know how difficult it is to fit a lot of people into our house (which is large by Japanese standards). Our youngest, whose "feelings" have allegedly been hurt often in recent times (this is one of his favourite phrases at present), showed no sign of hurt.
We clearly don't have 100% Aussie kids here. I'm doubting that it would have been such a non-issue in an Australian household. Am I right?
It's a really good reminder that often "hurt feelings" can be either flamed or dampened by how parents react. Because you understood the situation and reacted calmly, your son accepted that it was "just one of those things" and moved on.
ReplyDeleteI think the reaction from kids here would depend on how good a friend the classmate was. If they were culled and they were a very close friend I think my kids might be hurt about it, but if not so close I think there would be a pretty "meh" kind of response too.
ReplyDeleteAlso, you could clarify the story because you knew the parents of the birthday boy. I think this makes a bit of difference as well.