Janglish

We bought a cheap toy yesterday and found this wonderful English on the back: CAUTION!

• Beware of missing parts. (Yep, always a concern around here, but why is it a caution?)
• Do not drop, use smoothly.
• Do not use in case it has any defect or breakage. (Does this mean I shouldn't use it in case it breaks?)
• Child fewer than 4 years old directly disable. (Huh?)
• Do not use on the road, stairs, any dangerous places. It causes of hurt. (The toy or the child gets hurt?)
• Keep on eyes on the children not to swallow. Make safe from the suffocation.(This one is a challenge, how am I supposed to make something with small parts safe from suffocating my child? Actually the parts were so small that it is unlikely to cause suffocation, choking might be a bigger concern.)

Finally the last one makes perfect sense:

• Keep out of reach of children. (It's a toy for Pete's sake.)

Guess what it is? A Police Toy Set! Small plastic police car with removable policeman and very large gun! I have to say I have not the least concern about my 4 y.o. playing with it. Thanks for the CAUTIONS anyway.